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I can’t possibly be the only one who has this thought on occasion (sometimes frequent occasions). We’ve collectively been through some shit the past couple years, then throw in all the things we go through in our personal lives…it’s been rough! I’d be lying if I told you I haven’t had many days where I’m driving to the studio or sitting down to write or create and think “fuck, I’ve got nothing…I don’t know how I’m going to do this”. Obviously I can’t show up for class and tell you all “I’ve got nothing today-let’s all go home”. And being a firm believer in practicing what you preach- I show up and do it anyway. I’m sharing this because of the tremendous lessons that I’ve learned from the “show up for yourself and do it anyway” mindset: -I have never ever ever regretted showing up. Not once! Even as a student, I was always grateful I showed up. -On the days I felt I had nothing to give I’ve had some of my best classes (as a teacher and student). -When my brain wasn’t busy thinking of all the really cool shit I was going to do at the studio I was more connected with my body. This allowed my body to move more intuitively. -The growth and learning that occurs when I stayed devoted in these moments outshines what we learn on our best days. Don’t rob yourself of these moments by only showing up for yourself on the best of days. So, the next time you're thinking “I’ve got nothing”. I’m here to remind you, you have more inside of you than you ever imagined. It's absolutely normal and ok to have the "I've got nothing" days. Just show up. You’ll surprise yourself over and over again.
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You don’t have an expiration date.
Yeah, read that again. Let it sink in. We’ve been programmed to think that once you hit 30, if you’re not married with kids, established career, white-picket fence kinda shit, then your “market value” has somehow shrunk. FIRST OF ALL-- We don’t have a “market value”. Stop that narrative. Society is constantly telling us no, especially as we age. “You’re too old.” “You’re too young.” “You’re not established enough.” “You’re overqualified.” But when the clock strikes thirty, we’re just starting to realize who we are. We’re finally feeling more like ourselves than ever. And it’s around this time that we usually start to realize how much the opinions of others we’ve taken on. So let me say it louder for the people in the back: YOU DON'T HAVE AN EXPIRATION DATE. Hey, thirty-somethings — whether you meet societal approval or not, what’s your FAVORITE thing about this stage of life? Your life doesn’t need to be some cookie-cutter version of societal norms. We spend our whole lives trying to fit into perfect little boxes, based on what other people say is acceptable. Newsflash: You DON’T have to do or be certain things. You don’t have an “expiry” date. Your version of success, strength, confidence, sensuality — the list goes on — doesn’t have to look the same as anyone else’s. It’s time to STOP CARING about external validation and START focusing on the things that you really want and the things that feel good to you. At Catalyst Movement Arts, you have the freedom to define what strong and sexy means to you. Come to class! You’ll be surprised with a) how fun it is b) how supportive everyone is and c) the cool shit that happens when you tune into what YOU want. We can’t wait to see you in the studio! Here’s the class schedule and if you want to connect, drop a comment here or head over to Instagram. We’d love to hear from you.
There’s this assumption that whenever we’re doing deep work to reconnect with ourselves on our self-discovery journey that it’s going to be so heavy… like you’re going to have to wade through human doom and gloom to “get there”.
But it’s not like that! It’s not a heavy journey. Don’t get us wrong — it can be. There will be moments of struggle, both physical and emotional. We’re building skills and that’s just a part of it. But if we’re approaching this as a big, heavy skillset of something we “have to do”, we’re taking away so much joy from the experience before even starting! All you need is an open mind. Explore what happens! When you show up to class just to have fun —without the goal of mastering a trick, being the best dancer in the class, or whatever other thing you’ve decided you “have to” do — you’re making space for the lightness and happiness that comes with movement. One of the cool things that happens at the studio over and over again, is that women who’ve created that space for joy start to see the beauty in everyone around them. You’re in this place with women of all ages, shapes, sizes, and walks of life. Through witnessing how beautiful they all are, you start to take that inwards and see yourself in a brighter, better light too. You do not have to have a certain body type for us. You don’t have to change anything about yourself for us. Everything we’ve been told about what “ideal” beauty standards is absolute fucking trash. You are beautiful, exactly as you. Right here, right now. When you come into this space consistently, you’re going to witness beauty in a variety of forms. It’s kinda magical. And you don’t want to miss it. JOIN US in the studio! We can’t wait to get to know you. If you have any questions, drop them in the comments below or reach out to us on Instagram or Facebook. We’d love to hear from you! Hey friend, all that shame you carry was never yours in the first place. It’s time to let it go…3/8/2022 This is one of the biggest, most transformative realizations of my adult life-and one I wish I’d come to a lot sooner. It seems most of us carry some amount of shame with us especially when it comes to our bodies and sexuality. Still, it’s almost like the elephant in the room. We all know it’s there, but don’t have conversations around it.
All that shame we’re given about our bodies, our sexual pleasure, our desire to want more for ourselves, that’s not ours. Shame runs deep and sinks it roots down to the very core of our personhood. Every time we’ve presented our authentic selves and were met by insults, ridicule, rejection, trauma, etc. the roots dig down a little deeper. We begin to believe every bit of bullshit that’s been told to us. We begin to disconnect from our true selves and try our best to fit into all the boxes society has set out for us instead. Fuck those boxes (more on that another time) The more I’ve worked through my own struggles with shame, the more I wondered why we aren’t sharing and helping each other get to the other side of shame faster. There is so much joy and pleasure to be found on the other side. Pleasure, connection, love..those are your birthrights, not shame. One of the most beautiful things about the studio is having that space and time devoted just for you to explore and reconnect. Our mindset begins to shift to one of appreciation of what our bodies do for us. We begin to feel safe and strong and beautiful in our skin, sometimes for the first time ever. Fuck, it is hard to be vulnerable, but if you’ve had the resilience to carry all that baggage for so long, you are strong as fuck and more than capable of using that energy to heal. How many times in our lives have we dismissed ourselves from what we want? Often before we even give ourselves a real chance. Sometimes before we even try.
So much time and effort is spent talking ourselves out of things based only on “that’s not for someone like me”. “That’s for someone _______, not me”. Insert whichever word you choose: younger, smarter, more confident, stronger, etc. The list goes on and on. We’ve been raised on comparison, spoon fed it our whole lives. Comparison to other women, comparison to the images and bullshit messages we’re shown on mainstream media. Comparing and subsequently writing ourselves off becomes second nature. Over time, when we are thinking about something we really want for ourselves, our brains jump to “that’s not for you and here’s why…” It’s time to flip the script. Fuck what you’ve been told you should be like, what you should want, what someone else thinks should be for you. And to be fair, fuck our brains for going to “I can’t” on autopilot so often. Everything in the world may not truly be for you, but you're the only one who can decide that. That is just one of the reasons why reconnecting to ourselves is so important. What lights up your soul may have been hiding in what you wrote off as “not for me” this whole time. We all, to some degree, have been disconnected with ourselves. Whether it’s years of social conditioning, adapting our personalities to fit in with others, or even remnants of shitty relationships-we all have something about ourselves that gets buried along the way.
Our disconnects can be physical, emotional, sexual, etc. The list goes on and on. What parts of yourself have you hidden for the sake of others? Why do we prioritize making others feel good about themselves over feeling fulfilled and happy in our own skin? Moreso, why is this so acceptable and even worse, expected of us? How the fuck did this become what we are supposed to accept as our “normal”. The good news is, it doesn’t have to be. No matter how far down we’ve hidden these most precious parts of ourselves, they are still there waiting for us to find them again. Yes, it takes work. Yes, it takes time. Yes, it can (and will) be really fucking hard. Yes, it’s the best gift you can ever give yourself. Even better news…you don’t have to have your life turned upside down or run away for an Eat, Pray, Love type experience to reconnect with yourself. But, more on that next time. I’ve fucked up. I’ve fucked up more times that I like to admit. When I reflect on my vast amount of fuck ups (seriously, I could write a book), most of them have one common denominator. They all fall under the umbrella of my biggest fuck up ever-putting other’s opinions, desires, and expectations first. Sound relatable?
People pleasing had become so ingrained I didn’t even realize it had become a way of life. I wasn’t the slightest bit aware I was doing it most of the time, all under the guise of just trying to be a good kind person who would never try to intentionally upset someone. I changed my appearance, interests, and hobbies (or gave them up completely) to be more acceptable to whoever I was spending time with. And in some cases, it was a matter of survival. None of those things felt abusive or wrong. I was just trying to be the best, most lovable person I could be…to everyone but myself. After life threw me yet another series of curve balls, I sat there at the age of 36 with the realization I did not know who the fuck I was anymore. Did I really like this song? This meal? These clothes? This hair color? I had to relearn who I was when I took everyone else out of the equation. This is why connecting (or reconnecting) to ourselves is so very important. We will all have moments in life when we only have ourselves to rely on. All the nurturing and connecting we explore in and out of the studio will be yours no matter what. It’s something that can never be taken from you and something you can call on whenever you need it. It is truly the most precious gift you can give yourself. Reconnecting can feel scary and awkward (or just plain weird) at times. It’s ok-that’s normal. We have lifetimes of conditioning to unravel. Realizing the immense beauty and pleasure you can find in your body, for you and you first always can sound foreign or unheard of. Take this journey back to yourself in tiny steps, trust your intuition, don’t rush-everything is already there waiting for you when you’re ready. I’ve dedicated the last 10 years of my life to healing myself and learning to reconnect with my body. The process never ends, but is worth every bit of the work, that I promise you. It is my mission to help others find love, beauty, pleasure, and freedom in their bodies through movement. You’ve got this💕 People use the word sensual interchangeably with sexy. IT’S NOT THE SAME THING. You’re not connecting with your body. You’re going through the motions and sure, it’s cute — but it’s not sensual.
When we talk about sensual movement, we are talking about being fully present and connected to our bodies. Instead of thinking about choreography and routines, we are using our senses and allowing ourselves to move intuitively. Here’s a simple example: Think of a rose. Smelling a rose isn’t a sensual experience. But if you look at it, admire it, feel it against your fingertips, then smell it — THAT is a sensual encounter with this rose. While this may seem like a silly example, sensuality is really a conscious approach to life. It’s mind, body, and soul experiences… and that all stems from noticing and appreciating the process of whatever you’re doing. To live a sensual life, you don’t have to make more work for yourself. Heck, we’ve all got enough on the go as it is. Instead of focusing on the big goal and getting lost in the seemingly mundane everyday, nourish yourself between all those times… aka practice sensuality! Take the time to slow the fuck down. While you might not have the time (or desire) to keep a gratitude journal, you CAN think of something you appreciate every day before bed. There are little things built into your days, all you have to do is open your eyes to it! Take a moment to appreciate it! Here’s an example: Try to be FULLY PRESENT in the shower. Notice how the water feels as it trickles off your body. The texture of your loofah feels so good, doesn’t it? Ahhhh…. Inhale deeply; your body wash smells different than your shampoo. Did you ever notice that? And the lather of soap is so silky and smooth. This is an easy way to practice sensuality. It’s my hope that this is something you can use to nurture yourself every single day. And then when you get to that big goal you set out to achieve? It’s just a BONUS. You’re already living a gratitude-filled life and feeling whole. While we’re a pole studio and (of course) we teach pole tricks, that's just the start. Our real focus is on connecting (or reconnecting) with yourself through sensual movement. We believe dance is a catalyst for a deeper mind, body, and soul connection. Join us in the studio and we’ll give you the tools to let go, play, explore, and amaze yourself again and again! Sign up for our Intro Series or head on over to see what’s on the current class schedule. We can’t wait to see you in the studio! Oh, and if you like this blog you will LOVE what we share over on Instagram and Facebook. Can’t wait to connect with you! Loving yourself is NECESSARY. It’s not a luxury and it certainly shouldn’t be an after-thought. I challenge you to turn some of the love you’re pouring out to everyone around you, INWARD.
I know, I know… that’s easier said than done. And yes, I’m going to tell you how pole is going to help you love yourself. Pole is a great vehicle to practice your self-devotion (aka self-love)! What we do in the studio is so much more than tricks and skills. It’s about self-care, exploration, and nurturing. When we start working on physical skills in the studio, it helps you feel safe and secure in your body. Once you realize you’re safe in your body, you gain more confidence to dig deep and get into the growth work. It’s then that you begin to truly understand yourself — the things you like and don’t like, what feels good and not good at all — all this WITHOUT external validation. This kind of work takes strength — both mentally and physically. A lot of times we hear women use the excuse of, “Oh, I’m not strong enough to do that.” And they mean physical strength. But all you really need is to make the commitment to SHOW UP for yourself! That decision is an inner strength. It’s the start of everything you need to begin this journey. And by journey… well, I mean JOURNEY. This is going to take some time! Growth comes from consistency. You’re not going to be a “new woman” after one class. This isn’t something that just happens overnight. There’s no shortcut. This isn’t a “quick fix”, one and done. We offer a space for you to develop a long-term, loving relationship with yourself. Don’t be your own one-night stand! Commit to YOU. If you’re excited to learn more about what pole has to offer, you’re in the right place. Click here for the class schedule and join us in the studio. We can’t wait to see you! Oh, and follow us on Instagram for real-time studio updates and things you can do at home to begin your devotion to self-care, exploration, and nurturing. We’re thrilled that you’ve chosen to make yourself a priority. |
AuthorAndrea |
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